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Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今日圣诞，老猫先祝大家圣诞快乐，虽然是洋人的节日：）下午贾陆英老师继续在老秘网 y6 y$ [2 a4 M9 L5 d
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# C `8 h8 \2 L4 c1 h. \mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">群“重温经典读书会”49231471辅导我们学习《论语》。贾陆英老师一直记挂着我们这群“大学生”，原本这节课是安排在周三下午的，但贾老师届时另有要事，所以今日上午便特地在群里发出预告，提前到今日下午开课。有此良师，夫复何求？闲话少叙，立即把上课实录整理奉上。5 q: P3 X; j" r9 B: L1 c
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今天下午，我们学习讨论《论语》为政篇第4 C; }9 `0 l0 J% |2 s
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{: L% r. C3 Y1 mmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">章：: m; y8 R2 \" G7 w0 ] ]% Y5 jmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子问孝，子曰：$ }* l- @8 W9 T$ t. M5 g* w
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违。4 w$ l- \& j; K( B$ Q9 I9 Y
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$ V5 m) w8 o' p1 \; jmso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟御，子告之曰：+ j9 ~& Z6 u; D6 N! [. V0 L+ e1 h
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问孝于我，我对曰无违。" e- b+ Z a( o: d/ Ncolor:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”- o6 ?) l, Q$ R
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' D7 o. O5 q4 r: A/ qmso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟曰： [% O! y B; g$ i2 ~* T+ lmso-font-kerning:0pt">“0 Y& e+ ?) w$ {5 Q% u) }) A$ ?
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) w+ C: o& P7 ymso-font-kerning:0pt">何谓也？ k" g2 w" k, v0 \3 U b5 t
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">子曰：- }$ A) L: `: A9 Umso-font-kerning:0pt">“) }; w: i, g, ?) |' u3 @mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;) F. }* y4 d) q8 |" _% ~/ B( i
mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼；死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。# `) R" M$ a5 r Z) @
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; h3 }# @- q" d# Y3 Kmso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子：鲁国大夫，三家之一，姓仲孙，名何忌，懿是谥号。他的父亲孟僖子临死时要他向孔子学礼。无违：不要违背礼。樊迟：孔子的学生，名须，字子迟，比孔子小四十六岁。御：驾驶马车。孟孙：指孟懿子。4 @% k( s# G. n2 P+ d
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' R3 E4 H5 D- i2 z, Cmso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子请教孔子什么是孝，孔子说：$ P' K+ b! _) T& Z3 G. R2 @6 o/ [/ t10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">“( m" ]7 @- }" y/ R8 p
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) R% f9 M, ?! m" ]mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝就是不要违背礼。- v5 d: m8 i0 g( I$ K10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”$ o. A' z2 U- B& S2 p) B& f
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& `# `: X6 ]3 @6 ]$ \; W6 ymso-font-kerning:0pt">一天，樊迟给孔子驾车，孔子告诉他说：, m& ]' u0 t5 L3 Y7 v1 ~1 S* O: U0pt">"7 P1 h; p7 e" r3 q5 W
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问我什么是孝，我回答他说不要违背礼。( O4 p/ y: B# Q- v
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟说：- N- r, s! a4 R! N& s, ^) s! k j
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- ^8 d- Y* s4 @& g( [mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">这是什么意思呢8 y3 F* E0 h$ B" o# U: hmso-font-kerning:0pt">?" ! f4 p7 ^* B% r+ n# w2 n+ R! \
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孔子说：; n" O) i8 h# w: @1 zmso-font-kerning:0pt">"- d8 {$ H& N- K) P! z B6 v
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- |7 }; \* N6 X* vmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母活着的时候，要按礼侍奉他们；父母死了，要按礼来埋葬他们，祭祀他们。/ s; ~3 k" F6 b0 y! F/ \6 M
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：怎样理解孝就是/ `/ u1 d$ X( @9 c10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">“' r0 U' o7 e8 @$ m
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1 \% M/ ~/ s8 v3 ?0 d; {, T. s* Q7 vmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违) b8 _$ h! Q4 w# N: _
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% B, r, g, w) k1 g2 ]( e4 Wmso-font-kerning:0pt">答：孔子教人是很讲针对性的。孟懿子不能遵从他父亲贤而好礼之教，所以孔子针对他讲得. j5 e* K% g1 G9 O: lmso-font-kerning:0pt">“6 N: C' M' H' J1 S/ M0 ~font-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
* I5 d8 t, T" M) t' ?$ d) {mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违* G- T5 ?& b# N$ C$ G0 @( [
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4 Y- `" g/ T; G6 ^' ]mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，就是不要违背父亲的教诲，这是就具体情况所做的回答。但是就普遍事理而言，孔子讲' e1 I8 o" V* p1 | N8 x+ |
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+ \. n" N. A% T; O! c! Amso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违, t% v& U/ q# \$ Fmso-font-kerning:0pt">”4 E6 z1 C6 J: J8 [
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7 S! _1 Q2 d' X, R3 H/ L$ @mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，强调要以礼事亲，不可违背于礼， W, p, n" \9 A* t
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。) k' t( [# e6 h3 Z9 j! j0 i( V" K
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% ?( x1 C+ `' h( Wmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母在世，如有不合乎礼的言行，子女是不应当顺从的，而要以合乎礼的方法劝谏，这是对父母真正的爱护、尊敬。孝的精神，还应当体现在父母去世以后，要按照礼制去安葬他们、祭祀他们，这才算子女尽孝有始有终。3 q2 Q0 x# v3 f7 b
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( L/ ]# B; Z: B6 [% T* [mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：为什么说以礼事亲才是孝？* s; @0 E9 g I. t7 A
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">答：本章谈孝的重点是，孝要落实到礼上。孔子讲仁与礼的关系，一方面强调仁是礼的核心，礼应当体现仁的精神；另一方面又强调，礼的规定体现了仁的要求，依礼而行就是仁。据此，是否做到了孝，要以是否依礼而行来衡量。$ J4 R" P4 P+ @1 j! m
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; v# N: j5 x) ]( YTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！反过来说，虽然礼遇有加未必出于心敬，但若是不加礼遇那就一定是心不敬，也就是不孝啦。所以外在的礼对于孝来说很重要，如若无礼那必然是不孝！对父母尽孝道，是义" Z) @0 H. v, E. `
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！' d4 T- V; y8 m& s- e6 Z4 G4 gmso-font-kerning:0pt">——- Z+ ~' g- j8 mfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;3 a8 b; Z. E. r2 s# _! u$ i2 _
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">赞同。孝的本质，是发自内心的对父母的恭敬和感恩之情。有此心，才会有孝行。% F" V+ T* n. B% w. f- {. J
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">贾老，昨天晚生正好读到战国时期儒家关于礼、丧、祭的论述$ `8 F( g3 M& t e0 q, x' f! [
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5 g" i+ F6 b, Y5 q$ Z% Gmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。对父母的孝，绝对不能行功利主义，现在社会上很多人在父母有能力的时候，和颜悦色，等到父母年迈无力，不能给自己帮上什么了，就放弃赡养父母，这是一种巧言令色，有所图谋。这三点做到都是不简单的，先说不违，能够做到遵循父母的教导，按照父母意愿行事之人有几？晚生做不到，起码现在说，不孝有三无后为大，父母成天逼婚，依旧违背了。老吾老以及人之老啊* B, h* k% g- h$ T' {mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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( I4 ]5 Z6 M6 j- S9 r! d0 nTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。现在社会中，生前不依礼事亲，死后大操大办的现象很普遍，成为了陋习，也造成了很大的负担。" @! V$ V$ O. f; G9 O! y
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孝经
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% G. `7 s# M `" lTahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">贾陆英：+ k" e* q5 A" Q
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. z; Q% _+ m- f" F. p9 \Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。6 M* p a2 V; j' c. } l
mso-font-kerning:0pt">——. y* V6 @. m1 {( A) Afont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
/ T- L. w. l) M3 _3 \2 m2 Lmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对，这是从情感上关心父母，是尽孝的重要内容。生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。" M* P% }5 A ?" }, v/ v1 P
mso-font-kerning:0pt">——4 r) U0 u9 t' a0 k) Qfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
: `' R% j& M) F! C& ]* Fmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。《孝经》说：5 U* z7 i! r4 B, j q
mso-font-kerning:0pt">“/ a6 N! S5 n; u( ?$ ?0 ]' ?: E( f" wfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;( q$ E0 V! V- G1 U' M
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼者，敬而已矣。故敬其父，则子悦；敬其兄，则弟悦；敬其君，则臣悦；敬一人，而千万人悦。所敬者寡，而悦者众，此之谓要道也。3 A; S: `! }0 ]5 [mso-font-kerning:0pt">”/ y* h- x! G' q6 h
font-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
) f* V! D) d3 x' p) }mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼的内在依据是孝悌，而外在表现，就是一个# f; p* i9 R; v8 x; xmso-font-kerning:0pt">“* |4 L0 u+ O8 v- Vfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
( X+ L Y3 ~; F% S4 Jmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">敬 L2 S! s" J: N9 W
mso-font-kerning:0pt">”1 \6 w+ e) \7 Y4 Y& W9 F! u- efont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;1 i$ n S" \' [8 O1 s
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">字。所以，如能尊敬他的父亲，那么其儿子就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的兄长，那么其弟弟就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的国君，那么其臣下就会喜悦。尊敬的是一个人，却能使千万人喜悦。所敬者虽然只是少数，而喜悦的人却有千千万万，这就是为什么把推行孝悌之道和礼乐教化称为3 U3 E H7 i( Q. k% dmso-font-kerning:0pt">“) J+ n Q. U: m! j) V
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! Q5 k* ~* A2 h% Q; }mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">要道: F/ y8 S3 Q, E( h! f- K
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">的意义所在啊。0 b1 y6 F4 M$ K0 E8 _, a, {' ^' hmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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$ W; m' B( l; [/ a+ s ATahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">舍得：4 I6 t h- {# J6 ^0pt">
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) l; O0 j* T* c8 I: ^, YTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">嗯，这就是不孝有三的第一种。事谓阿意曲从，陷亲不义，一不孝也。我们通常将的孝顺的8 H1 i/ P# u5 Q2 R' R. Y' F
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* s, y- O/ A# \% I2 Tmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">其实就是不违的意思. Y3 A9 P: X4 N1 d6 W1 A$ D% bmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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